Mel Of Bacchus

I didn’t know if I was going to share this, as it still makes me so sick to think about and so to write about it, it’s like going back to that place and time. But I do think it’s important to document as it did happen, no matter how much I have tried to shut it out, it happened alone with all the other hard things I’m yet to write about.

So not long after finding out about Troy’s past (go back to this post) I tried my best just to stay low and not cause a lot of trouble for my Mum.

I was a pretty troublesome kid, calling out Mums lies and arguing about her going on the nod with my brother around and having strangers at our house all the time to drink and smoke bongs with her, most if not all she’d only just met.

I started borrowing educational books from the Drouin Library as I was still not enrolled in school and started teaching myself year 7 math.

I used to get the sums then go to the back of the book to get the answer and try and figure out a way to get the answer from the sum.

Mum and Troy continued their doctor shopping and arguing and fighting but for the most part they were so lovey-dovey and I found that was worse.

He was dangerous and I didn’t know how to tell Mum.

One night I woke up and I could hear Troy and my Mum having sex in the lounge room. I really needed to go to the toilet so I waited for the lounge to go silent before I opened the door and walked to the toilet and back again closing the door behind me.

I then heard Mum and Troy giggling. They felt “caught”.

That morning after our usual breakfast, dragon ball z and taking my brother to school routine I returned home to Mum and Troy asking me if I wanted to go to Dandenong with them. They said that Troy had gotten his Tax money from centrelink and that I could get a new phone cover for my phone (a Nokia 3315) and a few CD singles at the Dandenong Market.

I picked out a few CD’s I liked including the Chocolate Starfish Album and the “Crush” single by Mandy Moore Single. I think I may have even got the Aaron Carter Album too.

On the way home on the Train, Mum listened to the Mandy Moore song on my discman while I made light conversation with Troy about the new laser lighter, pocket knife and Oakleigh sunglasses he’d bought himself.

I also got him to fit my new roses phone cover onto my phone.

I looked over at Mum whom was now not looking at me but more glaring at me.

I asked if she was okay and she said sarcastically “oh, I’m fine” then said “Let me not interrupt your precious time with Troy..”

I looked at her with my face screwed up and said “oh as if.. He’s my stepdad!”

I looked for Troy’s reaction to back me up but he was ininterested and just went on with fitting my phone.

I said to Mum “There is something seriously wrong with you..” half laughing at how wrong she actually was.

Then she said so loud on the train full of people “Well why were you awake and listening to us Fuck last night then? You were imagining he was fucking you weren’t you?”

I said, “No, thats disgusting..” pulled my headphones out of her ears and was so embarrassed and just sank in my chair and put Limp Biskit on.

I was so mad and Mum switched chairs and proceeded to passionately kiss her husband putting his hand into the back of her pants right in front of me.

“Well, you cant have him Melissa, he’s mine aren’t you babe.. ” she said mid kiss prompting him to reply to me.

“Tell her” she sneered.

“I married your Mum Melissa, she is my wife” he said.

I got up and moved away and couldn’t wait to the train to stop so I could get away from them both. I hated him.. He was ugly and gross and dangerous and just yuk!!!

And in that moment I hated my mother for even suggesting that and having a whole carriage of people know that. It was uncomfortable and embarrassing and wrong.

I didn’t pick up my brother or go home until everyone was in bed that night.

Like what the hell?..

I was still 12.